Dear Flash
We have had success.
After your last message asking us to consider ways in reducing the influx of foregin immigrants into England, I have come up with a failsafe way of easing the situation. WE have created a situation where it would be embarrassing to be considered English. I recently asked Agent MacLaren to make our national football team look ridiculous. And it has been a success. Agent Robinson has magnificently made himself look stupid for the sake of the country. And recent reports have shown that the number of applications from Croatian immigrants has dropped. We have even had some applications English Nationals applying to go there, for fear of being tagged with the 'Enlgish are stupid footballers' label.

With such success, I am sure that the Prime Ministership will soon be in my grasp.

Your friend

Agent Brown Stain